subjective morality and other observations

Most of this is conjecture and speculation. None of the below statements reflect hard beliefs that I hold.

I was watching Mel Gibson's The Patriot a few weeks ago and there was a line that made me think. After the main character had stated his opposition to the proposed revolution in the colonial legislature, he was ask by the man proposing the war if he was a man of principle. He replied "I am a parent. I haven't got the luxury of principles."

I find that often many people, especially those of religious persuasion, speak in terms of black and white, right or wrong, moral or immoral as very finite structures. They often claim that there are ways to think and live and act that are hard set rules with no exceptions. Things like murder and honesty, theft and violence. And yet, nearly everyone will violate those rules and morals quickly, given the right circumstances, with no pangs of conscience. Further, while not everyone will verbalize this, most people will condone the violation of these principals given the right circumstances. For example, how many people would condemn the father who, as a last resort, steals to feed his starving children? How many people, myself being one of them, condone the death penalty, regardless of the fact that it meets every qualification of community sponsored murder? Most people would lie to save a life without a second thought and none would speak out against them for it.
How black and white are these "morals"? When is it acceptable to violate them and who has the right to make these determinations? No one and everyone. It stands to reason that morality can only really be guidelines and recommendations weighed daily against the situations we find ourselves in and balanced against the cause and effect of the action.